U R SAVING MY LIFE

Raindrops on cabbage and whiskers on kittens

In a moment of extreme triumph, I have returned! I am alive! I am no longer wallowing in self pity!!!

I would like to start by saying, wallowing is okay. It’s absolutely necessary sometimes to just be in your sadness and anyone who tells you to “get over it” or “move on” can fuck off. I’m glad I wallowed. It genuinely helped. I felt all the bad feelings and now I have energy again. I’m like a little seed that was warm and cozy underground and now I have emerged from the earth ready to bloom into a weird flower or maybe an herb.

HERE IS WHAT HELPED!

1. As we all know, I am sober. This means I miss out on a lot of cute little drinks and cute little drinks sometimes make life worth living. Thank God there has been a boom of cute little non alcoholic drinks lately and my current favorite are these alcohol free lavender bitters. I add them to plain water, sparkling water, hop water, tea…. the options are limitless. Make yourself a little na cocktail with them or a real cocktail for all I care! They taste incredible and I guess they have good stuff in them like ashwaganda too. I don’t care about that as much but it’s nice.

2. I’m fostering kittens through Angel City Pitbulls and they immediately turned my world upside down. Kittens are a living, breathing antidepressant. When they purr on your chest it’s like nothing bad has ever happened to you and nothing bad will ever happen again! My house smells horrible but the cuteness! It’s a trade off for sure. Noah hates it.

3. My podcast. Sorry but must plug. Our guest this week is Andrea Jin, who won a fucking Juno (Canadian Grammy) for her comedy album and she does not disappoint. Throughout the episode she compares her mom to Adam Sandler in Uncut Gems and I’m laughing out loud thinking about it now.

4. I’ve talked about Lindy West before but I read all three of her books in November and I’ve fallen even deeper in love with her. She’s so smart, so tough, and so vulnerable. My three favorite qualities! I think! If you want to laugh - read Shit, Actually. If you want to laugh and cry - read Shrill. If you want to laugh, cry and be borderline hopelessly angry - read The Witches are Coming.

5. My favorite food right now, other than beans, is braised cabbage. Cabbage is cheap and delicious and strangely filling and we should all be eating it. People think I’m insane when I say cabbage is my favorite thing to eat but just give me a chance! I make it like this ! Try it! Please!

   (Also if you make a fart joke -just know- I’ve heard it all and actually my stomach can handle these foods because I’m Eastern European! Get a grip! )